yupthatexists. Ninja fighter gingerbread cutter? Yup that exists. Colour changing shower head? Yup that exists.  Pizza sleeping bag? Yup that exists. Humanity’s appetite for bizarre invention? Yup that exists on this wonderfully eclectic site.
Click to remove
Click to remove. While this does exactly what it promises, it is just about the most literal and pointless activity we’ve had the pleasure of telling you about.
Payot’s best sellers of the week
Rank | Title | Author | Published By | Genre |
---|---|---|---|---|
1 | Inferno | Brown, Dan | Corgi Bantam Paperback UK | Thrillers |
2 | Doctor Sleep | King, Stephen | Hodder and Stoughton Ltd | Thriller |
3 | Swiss Watching: Inside the Land of Milk and Money | Bewes, Diccon | Brealey, Nicholas | History |
4 | A Delicate Truth | Le Carré, John | Penguin Books UK | Thrillers |
5 | The Girl Who Saved the King of Sweden | Jonasson, Jonas | Fourth Estate Ltd | Fiction Paperback |
6 | The Goldfinch | Tartt, Donna | Little Brown UK | Fiction Hard Cover |
7 | By Its Cover | Leon, Donna | Heinemann Ltd | Thrillers |
8 | The Kill List | Forsyth, Frederick | Corgi Bantam Paperback UK | Thriller |
9 | One Summer : America 1927 | Bryson, Bill | Black Swan Paperback | History |
10 | The art of thinking clearly: better thinking, better decisions | Dobelli,Rolf | Hodder and Stoughton Ltd | Essays |
Geneva celebrates 200 years as part of the Swiss confederation
This weekend, Geneva celebrates 200 years as part of the Swiss confederation. The festivities, which are a mix of official ceremonies, historical and contemporary plays, parades, shows and concerts will last from Friday to Sunday. During the course of the weekend, people will be able to discover what it was like to live in Geneva in 1814 through live reconstructions and a naval parade on 1 June. With only three days and so much listed on the programme here’s a quick rundown of things you surely wouldn’t want to miss.
Friday 30 May at 21h30 sees the premiere of “1814 ou la cuisine de l’histoire†a theatrical production bringing together comedians, dancers, singers and musicians. Right on the lake at Port Noir, this open-air production allows the public to learn about 1814 through the eyes of a child of today. Tickets are CHF 35 for adults and CHF 25 for students (and it’s on till 11 June).
On Saturday 31 May from 14h30 to 16h30 a historical parade will liven up the city centre. Starting from the Parc des Bastions and ending at Port Noir, the procession with more than 1,200 participants will thrill the heart of Geneva to the beat of communal bands and traditional and alternative music, including costumed groups and vehicles from a number of eras.
On Sunday 1 June the celebrations include a naval regatta, starting at 9h00, in which Lake Geneva’s six lateen sailboats will race off the Quai Gustave-Ador. These ancient trading boats were a regular sight on the lake in the early 20th century, transporting mostly construction materials; La Neptune, for example, could carry up to 100 tonnes of stones. At 15h00, these beautiful and historic boats will take part in a naval parade at Port Noir to commemorate the actual landing of Confederate troops 200 years ago.
It’s bound to be a fun weekend the whole family can enjoy. For the full programme, including events that continue until 19 May 2015, visit www.ge200.ch .
Emily Thetaz
European elections: The Swiss equation
GENEVA The right-wing surge in the 2014 European elections is unlikely to have an immediate impact on Switzerland, other than to reinforce immigration concerns among those who voted for curbs on foreigners in the 9 February Swiss referendum.
Apart from wishing to disengage as much as possible from Brussels, a prime message from Europe’s disgruntled or angry xenophobes, nationalists, protectionists and libertarians is that no sovereign nation, such as Britain and France, should have to absorb even more outsiders, particularly from eastern Europe, just because EU rules allow its citizens to work wherever they like.
The fact that many of these “foreigners†do jobs that locals are unwilling to undertake seems beside the point. Or that numerous Brits, French or Dutch themselves seek employment or set up businesses in Germany, Spain and Hungary. The same goes for the Swiss, 340,000 of whom live and work in the EU, but whose homeland desperately needs foreign labour – often skilled – to run its banks, hotels, restaurants, hospitals, farms, pharmaceutical manufacturers and other businesses.
Nevertheless, unless the four main pro-European groups in Brussels, who still represent 70% in the new parliament and continue to “control the money†– as one commentator put it – can address the critical issues that instigated such a devastating no-confidence vote, repercussions in Swiss-EU relations will undoubtedly emerge. Bern may have to contend not only with its own potentially expanding anti-migration constituency but also with backlashes among its neighbours. While some EU citizens view Switzerland as an example of precisely how not to lose one’s sovereign rights to Brussels, others regard the Swiss as arrogant, always seeming to take rather than give, or who manage to obtain benefits on their own terms regardless of the impact on others.
France’s Rhône-Alpes region bordering Geneva and Vaud witnessed a strong rise of the right-wing Front National in many of its cantons; the party gained 24.95% nationwide, compared with 6.3% in 2009. This is ironic given that numerous French have benefited enormously in the form of jobs and tax remittances from Switzerland because so many Pays de Gex or Haute-Savoie residents work on the Swiss side. The French and German border zones with Basel are experiencing the same. Many local entrepreneurs, some of them ardent FN supporters, have also enriched themselves from the property development boom since the end of the 1990s.
Earlier this week, European leaders mandated Brussels to explore exactly what has been going wrong – and how to put things right. This is considered crucial, even if some politicians complacently argue that the overall anti-EU vote was in reality “only†10-13% (less than 40% of Europeans bothered to go to the polls) so, other than sending a message, the upheaval is not as bad as one might think. But they ignore the registered gains of Britain’s UKIP (27.5%), France’s FN (24.95%) and Denmark’s DPP (26.7%) at their peril.
Others note that these right-wing groups are so disparate in their views that they will prove incapable of uniting as a single parliamentary force, so there is still time for mainstream parties to get things right. The far right parties are more likely to split into at least four factions. UKIP’s Nigel Farage, for example, made it quite clear that he considers Marine Le Pen’s FN neo-Nazi with racist leanings, and hence unacceptable as a coalition partner.
But none of this illustrates the real problem at hand, notably why almost two out of three Europeans neglected to go to the booths. The EU has failed to inspire the bulk of its citizens. This was evident in the way the various parties called upon voters with their pro or anti-EU posters. Apart from the main leaders, most of the candidates pictured were completely unknown to their electorates. Furthermore, except for Angela Merkel’s Christian Democrats in Germany, most of Europe’s mainstream parties have consistently failed to adopt policies responding to the needs of ordinary Europeans, such as how to alleviate unemployment or stimulate small business creation.
Even more to the point, Brussels has neglected to put across what the “project for Europe†is trying to achieve. Many Europeans see only what they perceive to be the negative aspects of a largely faceless supranational body rather than what this often top-heavy but nevertheless unusual experiment in governance has actually done to improve people’s lives in barely half a century.
For Switzerland, various commentators now see its principal challenge as how to define itself with regard to immigration and improve cross-border relations in a manner that ensures a win-win on both sides, whether in the form of regional vision or jobs. This might be an insurmountable challenge in light of prevailing scepticism, all too clearly voiced by Christoph Blocher this week when he told the Tribune de Genève, “Being in the European Union is not good for countries.â€
Edward Girardet, ed@staging.lenews.ch
EU elections: The Swiss right’s conundrum
Notwithstanding the long-term visions of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson Thomas Paine and other exceptional individuals, the wonderfully patriotic propaganda one often finds in American schools about how united the 13 colonies were against King George III has little to do with reality. What largely characterized the colonies was that they were beset by rivalries, jealousies and religious and linguistic disputes with little economic or political cohesion. Several almost went to war with each other over trade tariffs and forms of government. It took nearly a century, with one brutal civil conflict in between, to forge what is now a relatively cohesive community sharing – more or less – the same economic, political and legal system, plus a single currency.
While the United States periodically seems to approach the abyss egged on by self-righteous religious or xenophobic zealots, it continues to survive – and adapt, usually for the better. One only need remember the 1957 Civil Rights Act or the election of its first mixed-raced president in 2008. So why should one assume that an economic and political union of 28 European states, some wealthy, others backward, speaking 24 languages and with Christianity, Islam and Judaism its main religions, should get it right in less than five decades? Not unlike America’s own 238 years of history, the EU is very much in a learning process.
Without doubt, billions of euros are being spent or misspent every year to satisfy individual member states rather than the common good. And certainly, not unlike Washington, Brussels seems to promote a distinctive top-down approach that has little to do with ordinary people on the ground. Yet despite its numerous shortcomings, many of which could – and should – be overhauled, the European project has already achieved a lot, much of it below the radar. Such changes range from shared efforts to create uniform medical and other technical standards, curb invasive species destroying our agriculture, eliminate costly mobile phone roaming charges, abolish unnecessary and expensive trade tariffs, allow passport-free travel and the development of effective passenger rights at European airports.
Brussels’ failure – and that of other member states – is that it has neglected to bring the EU to its own citizens. There are too many governments, lobbies and those with hidden agendas out to pick what they can from the European cash pie. And this is exactly what the right-wing backlash in the 2014 European elections has revealed. This weakness now needs to be acted on. It is time to for the EU to explain the learning process to the electorate.
Switzerland, too, has much to learn – and benefit – from the EU. For one, it could start eliminating its own costly cartels. But the Swiss also have much to offer, notably new technologies, quality education and even conflict mediation. Perhaps, too, its contribution could include advocating a more effective system of direct democracy within the EU that ensures local communities have a voice that is listened to not only in their own capitals but also in Brussels. The right wing in Switzerland may take succour from the resurgence of the right in the EU, but it will be well advised to ensure closer ties with the EU, so as to convince its ideological allies of the need to boost the introduction of more direct forms of democracy within their countries and the EU as a whole. This will improve the accountability and performance of the EU’s institutions, which will result in more inclusive and rational decision making, in a way that avoids the potentially catastrophic splintering of the Union. Failure of the Swiss right wing to engage with the EU at such a level and instead pandering to the lowest common denominator – xenophobia – could trigger EU break up on an exaggerated assumption – the problem of immigration. This will not serve Switzerland or the EU well.
Edward Girardet, Â ed@staging.lenews.ch
Of bugs, bacteria and human behaviour
Funny things, bugs. I was pondering this the other day, as I sat watching my children performing in a school play. They were on opposite sides of the stage and I spent an hour trying to make eye contact with them both at the same time, so no one could accuse me of loving the other one more.
Anyway, in the wave of dizziness that followed this eye-swivelling, I had something of a profound scientific thought, and it was this: my children owe their personalities mostly to bacteria.
The school play was, fittingly, about mini-beasts. On the left of the stage was the seven-year-old, dressed as a butterfly, and taking her role very seriously: she stood up straight, focused herself, remembered all her lines and didn’t miss a beat in the Butterfly Dance.
And over on the left … the nearly-five-year-old, playing a spider and not taking it seriously at all. As I watched her gurning at me and trying to fit her head into a tambourine, I muttered through gritted teeth, ‘Please behave. Please keep your clothes on. Please don’t turn around and moon the audience (as she once did to her surprised grandparents, on Skype).’
The children are absolutely nothing like each other. Nor are they anything like their parents.
My husband, for example, has two moods – Absolutely Fine and A Bit Grumpy – but he has somehow sired a small diva.
“Where does she come from?†we’ve asked one another more than once, while our elder offspring lay on the floor, clutching her brow and sobbing because we’d denied her a sweet / a later bedtime / her own pony / a new house with stabling in her bedroom for her own pony.
Nor does all this drama come from me. I may not be as even-keeled as my husband, but I’ve certainly never run down the road screaming to be adopted because I wasn’t allowed two helpings of dessert.
And the younger child. There’s no explaining her. No one, in her immediate or extended family, has ever stripped off and raced naked through the local garden centre, cackling madly. None of us would mortify our mothers like that.
So if it’s not genetics and it’s not socialisation (and please trust me, it’s not socialisation), what is it? The answer came to me as I watched my mini-beasts on stage … it’s bugs.
Not long ago I read that up to 90% of the cells that make up our bodies are actually bacterial. On a cellular level, we’re more bacteria than human.
Well, that’s good to know. It takes some of the pressure off having to wear make up all the time, for a start (why bother? I’m bacteria). But it also helps me understand my children. Obviously the elder child is made up of a few well-behaved probiotics, and a large amount of Escherichia coli, which is nothing if not dramatic.
And the little one … well, my bet is with Borrelia burgdorferi. According to my research, it’s small and fast-moving, and it can cause terrible damage to your nerves. After my garden centre experience, I’d say that’s about right.
Robyn Goss is a South African writer, recently moved to Switzerland. You can read her blogs at www.robyngoss.com. Robyn@staging.lenews.ch